what a load of horse shit.

10:14am:

we went to the mountains for the fourth. there were photos taken. highlights included:

- using the bathroom at a gas station, and in that bathroom was a small decorative table, covered in a tablecloth, that featured a poster of dale earnhardt jr, a small wooden clipper ship model, and a basket of fake pine cones and leaves.

- dinner at the awesome jalapeno grill. i stuffed myself silly.

- went with my homeslice nate and saw t-model ford, who totally killed it. 89 years old and more of a badass than anyone i know, or maybe even everyone i know added together.

- thrift store shopping, including an amazing airbrushed velvet viking painting.

- went to the lake. burt went swimming for the first time. we took photos of him wearing sunglasses.

- minor league baseball game followed by somewhat mediocre fireworks. the highlight, other than the junkfood, was we saw a guy who looked IDENTICAL to murderface from metalocalypse. chelsea had no idea who murderface was, so i made her memorize what the guy looked like and then showed her a photo at home. she concurred.

- breakfast with jake & lauren and baby rambo, who is fat as shit.

- saw a woman on the back of a motorcycle reading a paperback.



that was about it, i think. it was a pretty good fourth.

9:22am:

unexciting brief weekend update:

went to wilmington to see a good friend play music this past weekend, bookended by two trips to the beach (wilmington is at the beach for those not local).

played in the water, got rained on, ate tasty food at pts and waffle house and some mexican, ate britt's donuts (some of the best donuts in the world, no joke).

many laughs at the dregs patrolling downtown wilmy...heard a redneck woman refer to a club as "shitty as fuck" which tickled me to no end.

4 day work week, that's excitement.

9:54am:

weekend was looking to be a bore...chelsea was in LA visiting her grandparents and i had thought my plans for the weekend fell through. i was kinda down about it actually. but things got pretty fun.

friday i went to the record store, bought a new year record on sale, some shitty pizza, and put together a puzzle.

the next day i had a morning skate but it was ungodly hot so it didn't last very long...i drank a half gallon of water and soaked through two shirts in the process. then my man brian came up from wilmington to hang out, play some basketball, etc. he was going to come up for the whole weekend, then flaked, and then decided to come up for half, thankfully.

that saturday afternoon we went out and met up with the boys and played some basketball. again, too hot really to play but it was fun anyways. after that we cleaned ourselves up, took burt to the dog park to romp around, and then met up with ivan in chapel hill for burritos at the only good spot i've found in the area and then the camera obscura show. they were fantastic, for the record - i've seenthem a few times and this was their best showing.

sunday morning brian and i grabbed some bagels and then he rolled back home to celebrate father's day with his kid. i celebrated it by dicking around the house with my child, burt, who didn't get me nothing for the holiday! ungrateful bastard. later that day there was more basketball, which i'm still sore from, and then took burt to the dog park to get piled on by the other dogs as often happens.

10:19am:

friday = the hangover. i haven't laughed that hard in a long, long time. couldn't recommend it any more highly.

saturday = morning skateboarding. i probably sweated off 5 pounds over an hour and a half, but i put it back by literally drinking a gallon of water.
saturday = parents came to town for a visit. burt was happy to snarf with his best friend max for hours on end. it was the step-dads b'day. went to the fancy grocery store "southern season", ate some pizza, and they all drank a shit load of beer. closed the night out with ice cream cake from trader joes.

sunday = chainsaw'd some trees in the backyard. ate breakfast at waffle house. went to the flea market, bought a couple more dog paintings.
sunday = basketball. i'm sore.
sunday = i watched a bunch of movies. "the happening": pretty meh, "the signal": also meh, and "bride wars": it nearly ruined my life.

got a bachelor weekend coming up since chelsea is off to LA to visit the grandparents. me and burt, out on the town, trolling for hot bitches.

5:21pm:

let's review my long weekend in SF shall we...

flew out thursday affternoon. of course my flight was delayed...actually both legs were. typical. i got in around 11 and todd took me straight to cancun for a late night burrito...i hadn't had any dinner so i was starving.

friday i got up, stuffed myself with puffy chinese doughnuts (you can't get those out here, sadly), and rode the bus to amoeba. then walked from amoeba to jay's cheesesteak on divis for lunch, and walked to the fillmore from there. that's a lot of walking for someone as lazy as me, but i hate waiting for the bus even more than walking.

that night todd, his lady jamie and i went to the A's game...they whipped up on the orioles, good times had by all. saw one of the longest home runs i've ever seen. ate some veggie dogs and a chocolate malt.

saturday was skate day. we went over to noe and picked up drew, filled ourselves with the always tasty noe bagels in my old stomping grounds, then went down to menlo to skate the park with the bowl trolls. there were a couple of videos taken that i'll post on my sadly ignored website eventually. after menlo we rode up to skate redwood, but there was a contest going on...watched the kids fling themselves around for a few minutes before deciding to head to pacifica to finish the day. did some old man cruising in the bowl which is always enjoyable (and tiring).

that night drew, his wife thao, todd, jamie and i went to gaspares for the best pizza in SF. it's not a trip back without a visit to gaspares, and of course some joes ice cream for desert.

sunday morning todd and i went up into the heart of the marina to get some breakfast with all the douchbags and douchettes in their matching workout wear. after stuffing ourselves we went over to the town for another A's game - this time i splurged for awesome tickets, just a few rows behind home plate, completely awesome. plus the A's won again, sweeping the series. the boys are playing well right now.

i had a redeye sunday night, going to eat one more cancun burrito before boarding the plane. the ride sucked, packed...everyone in my row was the same size as me, not comfortable. then on the second leg the guy next to me was easily 350 pounds, eating into most of my airspace - i couldn't sit upright at all. what does a man have do to get a seat next to a tiny girl?

i went into work for a little while right from the airport despite not having sleep a wink, but then headed home at lunch time to take a nap. i still feel googly, but better. and as much as i love and miss SF, it's good to be home to the lady and varmints and the house.

9:10am:

i was going to do a weekend update but how about a whole week update! mainly because sharon and ian, as part of their cross country/cross world tour, visited us in the suburban enclaves of cary. in typical fashion to our current lives, and since it was the middle of the week and both of us had to work, we did nothing exciting other than feed them fatty foods...but i think they enjoyed having a couple of days just to unwind. we took them to five guys (tasty east coast burger chain), mellow mushroom (southern pizza chain), ole time barbecue (old school bbq joint), and goodberrys (local frozen custard chain). outside of that, it was just a lot of sitting around the house, mucking with the pets and such.

the weekend was fun enough. some yardsales on saturday, where i got a slimer (ghostbusters) hand puppet. and sunday was a morning skate sesh followed by some weedeating and napping. this skating in the south during the hot day...taking some getting used to.

leave for sf thursday afternoon...can't wait!

10:25am:

since my car broke down last week and i had to leave it in the mountains, this weekend i had to go back up and pick it up. i drove up friday afternoon and got there in time to get dinner with the family and the rash clan at the always glorious jalapeno grill. sweet merciful jesus did i stuff myself silly - queso dip, enormous bean burrito with sides, and some churros with ice cream for desert. i'd give anything to have a place this good in the triangle.

saturday i ran around with my mom - yard sales, thrift stores, breakfast at the trailer, the usual shit. hit up the harvest (where you order your food from a phone at your table) and jack frost (homemade super religious ice cream stand), and then drove back to the old lady and the pets in cary.

sunday i was hoping to do a little yard work, but it rained all day. so we painted the bedroom and ran some errands. finally bought a weedeater. watched the survivor finale. yelled at the dog for being insane. typical, unexciting.

9:27am:

drove up to the mountains this past weekend, and by "drove" i mean that we got about 30 minutes away and the thermostat in the engine broke and the car started overheating and after a few hours we got towed the rest of the way there. great way to spend a friday night, i recommend it highly.

saturday was just a lot of running around, going ot some of my favorite stores and such while chelsea and my mom drove down to gaffney, sc (home of the peach-shaped water tower for those scoring at home) to go to some outlets. i found the greatest velvet viking painting but it was way too much money...but i'm keeping my eye on it and when it gets marked down it will be MINE!!!

that afternoon we took a short boat ride on my mom's new fancy boat. and then got shut out of the greatest mexican restaurant on the east coast because uof a private party.

sunday we had a bbq for mother's day, with (fittingly) my mom doing a lot of the work. lots of friends and babies roaming around. well, toddlers were roaming, babies were just lying around, crying, sleeping, and occasionally suckling on a titty. there was fake hot dogs and homemade ice cream, so it was a good day.

---

bought a ticket to visit the yay area the first weekend of june. hopefully i'll see some of you fools.

2:29pm:

haven't updated in a while - usual shit has been going on: working in the yard, looking for a job, playing basketball. it's starting to get hot here, time to spend a few months constantly sweating.

this past weekend we went to rhode island for the wedding of one of chelsea's close high school friends. it was in a fancy catholic mansion on the coast just south of providence. i've been to handful of catholic weddings, but this was the first one that included mass. kinda interesting, kinda creepy.

we stayed in a cool hotel - nylo. very hip and stylish, part of a revovated mill from the mid 1800s. in fact, this mill was the birthplace of the "fruit of the loom" brand.

also saw the movie "i love you, man", which i laughed my ass off at. i'm not afraid to admit i have a man crush on paul rudd.

that was about it i guess...went to an outlet mall. ate some of the best pizza in the world. looked at mansions in newport. yelled at the gps.

8:49pm:

been a busy few days/weekend/what have you...the in-laws came in on wednesday night and it's been a lot of eating out, entertaining, and everything like such as.

drove down to bath (oldest town in north carolina, circa 1705)/new bern (only slightly younger than bath) to look at old buildings and take a boat ride in the pamlico sound, but it was too choppy to ride very long. the boat ride was on my mom's fancy new boat...i'm not much of a boat person, but it's a pretty snazzy ride.

honestly, that's about all i can think of to report. heard back from my old job and there is a small chance of getting called back soon, i guess they are just waiting to see if the increased budget gets passed. cross your fingers for me.

8:35pm:

weekend was a lot of domestic shit...beautiful weather equaled yard work. lots of visits to lowes and a bunch of other home/yard product shopping. bought a lawnmower, which i have to use tomorrow before the yard completely takes us over ala the stephen king segment of the movie "creepshow".

also, three trips to the dog park for the devil hound, which he greatly enjoyed. also discovered he loves to chew on...well, everything really, but in particular the soccer ball that was left from the previous owners.

not much else happened honestly. worked on my third (of three) cd shelves, which i finished and painted earlier today. watched the heels win their final four game, with the championship starting in just a few minutes. surprisingly, i don't think i watched a single movie.

the in-laws come in this week. should keep us busy.

8:28pm:

what to report on, let's see...

it's the ncaa tourney, so i watched a lot of basketball this weekend. the heels won both of their games and are in the final four, woot toot tooty.

i built the second of my three cd shelves, put it in place this after noon and started loading it up. this one went a lot quicker, having learned from my mistakes on the first one. hopefully build the final one this coming weekend and have it in place before the inlaws come for their visit.

watched "rachel getting married". pretty uncomfortable flick, not my cuppa. well acted and put together, but not really enjoyable in any way. cool that the singer from tv on the radio was one of the stars though (the groom), and robyn hitchcock performed a little bit.

also watched the doc "king corn" which was quite entertaining and informative about how fucked up the u.s. corn industry is. i learned a lot.

other than that...lots of shopping, errand running, chelsea did some painting and yard work, played some basketball, played with the dog, ate junk food...the usual.

7:42pm: items of note:
my website is the number three result when you search for the phrase "handful of assholes", and it pops up on the first page when you search for the phrase "penis douche nozzles".

it's been raining here a lot. i hate the rain.

no job yet but i did get an email about some potential part-time work. not holding my breath though.

superchunk is playing a in a few weeks and i'm damned excited.

there is a house wren that has built a nest in the tool storage locker right outside our back door...there are 5 eggs in the nest now.

"wild china" is a great documentary series, especially on bluray.

this damn dog is driving me crazy. but he's so cute you just deal with it. all this rain is severely limiting his exercise, which makes him bonkers.

11:45pm: for shits and giggles, here are 13 of the most awesome cover songs (that i happened to have handy on my computer).

1. A To Z- Cops & Robbers (Tim & Eric cover)
2. Call & Response - Baby I'm-A Want You (Bread cover)
3. Deerhoof - My Pal Foot Foot (Shaggs cover)
4. Elliott Smith - Thirteen (Big Star cover)
5. Gories - Gimme Some Money (Spinal Tap cover)
6. Oakridge Boys - Carry On Wayward Son (Kansas cover)
7. Pavement - The Killing Moon (Echo & The Bunnymen cover)
8. Radar Bros - Slack Motherfucker (Superchunk cover)
9. Reigning Sound - Suspicious Minds (Mark James & Elvis Presley cover)
10. Supergrass - I Just Dropped In (To See What Condition My Condition Was In) (Kenny Rogers cover)
11. Teenage Fanclub - It's So Hard To Fall In Love (Sebadoh Cover)
12. Ukrainians - Batyar (Bigmouth Strikes Again)(Smiths cover)
13. Yo La Tengo - You Tore Me Down (Flamin' Groovies cover)

download:
http://www.sendspace.com/file/l430jy

9:39pm:

weekend was spent finally getting better from being sick, and having chelsea get sick herself. she's been acting half dead for the last couple of days, hopefully she will come around back towards health in a day or two.

my mom and bryan came down again this weekend to test drive the boat they might be buying. they brought max, he and burt played and played and played...they get along royally. burt gets so sad after they leave...maybe someday we can get him a companion.

i also finished the first of three cd/media shelves for the man room. painted it a little while ago, and will hopefully put it into place tomorrow. i learned three key tips along the way that made things run smoother:
1. pre-drill the holes, at least partially.
2. got a more powerful drill - my cordless handyman drill just didn't have the torque.
3. star-head wood screws are infinitely easier to screw than phillips head.

watched the doc "off the grid: life on the mesa" - pretty interesting about basically a lawless slice of land in new mexico where a group of malcontents, mentally deranged war vets, anarchist uneducated teenagers, and drug addicts have laid their hat. it looks like "road warrior" out there. kinda interesting, and will make you want to bathe after watching it.

updated le website with musics, some tardy thanksgiving and christmas photos, and a gentleman jesse review...
http://www.doginasweater.com/

12:22pm: i'm starting to feel better, but i'm guessing no less than a few pounds of phlegm have drained out of my head over the past 24 hours. where the hell does all of this come from, seriously?

went to a matinee of "watchmen" yesterday - i thought it was great, but i'm not sure it was for everybody. it's not a typical superhero movie...it's more of a "what if terrence mallick made a superhero movie" type of film. they left out a lot from the book (clearly a necessity as it would have been 10 hours long otherwise), and i'm not sure how many plot holes there actually were as my brain was surely filling some of them in. but i liked - it looked great, the music was a little cheesy though.

going to go buy a saw and wood to start the media shelves today.

8:31pm:

went up to the mountains this weekend, babies galore.

saturday was parties times two - a day party that was a baby shower for some good friends, and a night party for my mom's old crazy-ass friends. both were fun in their own way, i stuffed my face with catered mexican food, looked at a lot of babies, watched the heels lose, and won the song naming party game with chelsea.

sunday we had lunch at mamaws, more baby action with my cousin emily, and then drove back home. burt barfed in the car. it smelled wonderful, and it was cold and rainy so we couldn't put the windows down.

also, i broke my fancy phone last week and i'm back to using a 5 year old shit box. no replacement i guess until i get a job, and after looking for work for a week that might be a LOOOONG time. there is very little out there.

also also, i might be getting sick. i never get sick, so when i do get sick every once in a blue moon it is compounded by being pissed off my sickless streak ends.

10:42pm:

fairly fun weekend, aside from the beginning.

went into work friday morning for my last day to turn in my computer and badge and all that shit. the boss says he wants and hopes he can bring some of us back soon - there is plenty of work to be done, just need to get some budget for workers. i'm not holding my breath, but at least it is a small glimmer of hope...i really liked this job.

chelsea left work early and we drove down to wilmington, met up with my homeslice brian and then trucked down to myrtle beach to see morrissey. brian used the hour plus drive to hammer a few beers in the back seat, and proceeded to get us off course. he's never been a good navigator.

finally got to the house of blues (which shares a parking lot with the alabama theatre, yes the country band alabama...welcome to myrtle beach). had some special tickets that got us in early, so we got great seats right along the railing. everyone else with the early tickets rushed to the front of the stage so they could touch hands with morrissey.

so as not to be long winded, he canceled a bunch of shows before this one because he was sick. and he was sick during this show, only playing a hair over an hour. and he has since canceled his following shows. so it sucked he didn't play very long, but he did play "how soon is now" and "ask" and "this charming man", and those were all amazing.

we finished the night gorging on krispy kremes.

next day we got up and played with his kid ben and chatted with his wife katherine, had a tasty lunch, and rolled back to the triangle. i played some basketball that afternoon and that was about it.

sunday, chelsea went on a long lesbian hike and we did a little yard work and watched unc beat duke AGAIN. glorious. the weather has been just amazing the last few days.

today was the first official day of unemployment - i updated my resume, watched a lot of tv, gave the dog a bath (he smelled like a bucket of rotten fish, not pleasant), played some basketball, and listened to an npr story about a part time janitorial job getting 700 applications. pretty excited about looking for work right now, let me tell ya...

here, i made a little mini-mix of songs for the downloading and listening and such:
1. Bowerbirds - In Our Talons
2. C Average - Strider '88
3. Crooked Fingers - Modern Dislocation
4. Dreamdate - The One I Need
5. Mojave 3 - Big Star Baby
6. Ol' Dirty Bastard - I Can't Wait
7. Sloan - In The Movies
8. Surrounded - Safe Tomorrow Sun
9. Teenage Fanclub - It's So Hard To Fall In Love (Sebadoh cover)
10. The Kinks - Strangers
11. The Roots - Criminal (featuring Saigon & Truck North)
12. The Sleepy Jackson - Devil Was In My Yard
13. Too Short - Life Is Too Short

download songs:
http://www.sendspace.com/file/38rt0t

11:56pm: game room/man cave/what-have-you
it's coming along...photographic evidence:



you can clearly see the foosball table and pool table. will be bringing the dart board down from my mom's house soon, and planning on buying one of those ping pong tops that fit over pool tables. gaming!

also, the wall behind the pool table with the large white rectangle on it - this whole wall will soon be covered with floor-to-ceiling shelves for cds and movies and such. and by soon, i mean starting next week i guess since my ass is out of work.




the "chilling area" as it were...still trying to decide on wall hangings and i'm not too happy about the mantles over the fireplace, but not sure what to do there. might try whitewashing the wood paneling over here, see how that looks.

just out of sight to the right is my small desk area and the vintage original light fixture from the mid-60s.

9:14am: i was going to do a weekend update, but i suppose the big news is i just got laid off. yay! this would be #3 in nine years for me. nothing like being a completely disposable worker! last day is the end of the week. there is an outside chance they'll bring me back at the end of the month, but i'm not counting on it.

i guess i'll post other crap later, out of boredom.

9:45am: a good friend recently had a baby. well, his wife had it to be completely honest. anyways, i asked him how things were going, and this was his response...

"Lots of crying, but when not crying, lots of sideways looks. She's pretty funny looking. Lots of the arm waving, spastic."

this makes me laugh every time i read it. spastic.

----------

i just watched the austin city limits of roky erikson...billy gibbons was in his band. you know when billy gibbons is in your band, it's going to be fuckin' awesome, and it was.

----------

the girl who checked me out at the big lots was named sapphire. i figure with a name like that, you only got two job options: stripper or discount store cashier.

9:40pm: 15 album meme that i stole from conan...
This is a meme going around on the internets here it is:

Instructions: Think of 15 albums, CDs, LPs that had a profound effect on you. Changed/saved your life. Shifted/expanded your musical horizons. Was the soundtrack to major life events. Then, type them below. Then, tag some people. Go to...

firstly, we'll hit the big three of north carolina...

1. archers of loaf - icky mettle.
i had a friend who went to the school of science and math in durham and was much more keyed into the local chapel hill scene. he introduced me to the archers (and small 23)...i can still avidly remember seeing them for the first time not long after that in boone.

2. superchunk - tossing seeds (singles 89-91).
i had heard talk of superchunk, and i'm not even sure i knew they were locals at first. i had this cassette special ordered from the local radio shack (they also carried tapes and cds, and were always cool about ordering me anything i wanted). not sure why i picked this over their other couple of albums, but it put me on a path to indie rock fandom (this was a few months before the archers entered my life).

3. polvo - celebrate the new dark age ep.
i had actually loved polvo well before this ep came out, but it was this release, which came out my freshman year of college, that cemented them as one of my all-time favorites...and is still my favorite release by them.

4. butthole surfers - rembrandt pussyhorse.
5. fugazi - repeater.
6. minor threat - out of step.
these three will always be grouped together in my head, as i bought them all at the same time during a model u.n. trip to boone in the ninth grade. this was my first real foray out of metal. i was just starting to get interested in skateboarding, and i'd seen each of these bands mentioned in the skate mags. if they were affiliated with skating, i wanted to know what they were all about. i was not disappointed, though it took a few listens to crack the code of the butthole surfers.

7. neutral milk hotel - in the aeroplane over the sea.
a friend and i went up to humboldt to visit her sister, and during a gathering of a bunch of skateboarding hippies this album got put on by a dude named jeff. i couldn't believe my ears. i sat there listening, wearing a fake moustache, having my brain melted. i know this is a trendy choice, but fuck it, i love this record.

8. the ramones - mania.
i don't remember if it was 7th or 8th grade, but a friend and i somehow hitched a ride with an older kid to the winston salem mall and i bought this solely because he told me to. i like it, but it took a 2-3 years before it really sunk in how amazing their songs were.

9. built to spill - perfect from now on.
i spent a large chunk of my college years driving around in my car listening to this album after a friend gave me a copy of it. i had heard a few tracks from "there's nothing wrong with love" but this was an epic masterpiece.

10. the pixies - doolittle/trompe le monde.
i came to the pixies a little late, right when trompe le monde came out...but i got it and doolittle at the same time so they are always linked in my head. i was a sophomore, my friend was the school president, and he turned me onto them.

11. the replacements - pleased to meet me.
this wasn't my first replacements album...i got both "don't tell a soul" and "all shook down" from one of those music clubs. but this is the one that cemented their greatness. i still maintain that "alex chilton" is one of top 5 best rock songs of the last 25 years.

12. morrissey - kill uncle.
this album always finishes pretty low on most moz fan lists, but it was my introduction to the man and it still holds a strong place in my heart...i've been known to break out into accapella versions of "sing your life" at any given moment. just mentioning it has it stuck in my head now.

13. slayer - reign in blood.
this album taught me what i thought was heavy metal, the cinderellas and bullet boys of the world, were nothing but prissy hard rock bands with lots of hairspray.

14. dinosaur jr - whatever's cool with me.
like other bands mentioned here, this wasn't my first dinosaur jr album, but it was and still is my favorite. i think it also stands out because a girl i had a crush on in high school was shopping at the same music store in the asheville mall when i was buying this, and we had a long conversation about them while my heart was all aflutter. i had a crush on her forever and had a brief fling with her a couple of years later...i'm not saying mascis and co. made it happen, but they didn't hurt.

15. the clash - s/t. i bought this cassette on a whim out of the bargain bin of a drug store at some point in high school. still probably the greatest thing i've ever bought at a drug store, or at least tied with the homemade cherry cokes i used to get at the drug store next to my mom's work that still had an original counter in it.

9:02am:

many fun things happened this weekend. probably the most important was getting my pool table. POOOOOL TABLE!!! it's a lifelong dream come true, honestly. i know that sounds stupid but what can I say, I dream big.

good friends jake and lauren came down from the mountains and stayed with us saturday night. it's always fun to hang with them...played pool, foosball, apples to apples, and watched some tv carnage. and laffed.

we got up the next morning and ate a giant breakfast, which i might still be full from.

what else...closed out our storage unit, we are officially completely moved in to the house. watched the heels lose to a terrible team and that left me in a pissy mood. did some more this and that around the house. forgot to take photos of the house yet again, but i promise to do it this week, along with updating my stupid neglected website.

might go to wilmington this weekend.

9:22am:

weekend:

painted the hall.
got the dog bathed.
watched basketball.
unloaded crap from the storage unit.
ate an awesome milkshake.
watched "burn after reading" - pretty funny, pitt is excellent.
went to lowes (i've been to lowes more times in the last month than in my whole life).
set up the pool table delivery for next weekend.

i still need to take photos of the house.

9:37pm: i made a mix for a friend...you can download it here if you want to:

http://www.sendspace.com/file/tn0px8

i'm too lazy to write out the track list, but there are bunch of awesome songs on it, just like mixes usually have.